Writing and Understanding

I had considered writing a short piece about etymology of the word catholic. After I wrote a couple of sentences, I abandoned that idea. Today, there was a thunderstorm warning. I kept waiting for the thunder, lighting, rain, and hail. There were forecasts throughout the afternoon, predicting this storm. Part of me wanted the spectacle of the storm to come and disrupt my quiet afternoon.

I had decided to stay inside my apartment. Then I decided to run errands, to go about my life. I walked to the grocery. On my way I saw a short middle aged woman wearing a red fishing hat. At the traffic light at Eighteenth Street, I had the red light. I was supposed to wait. There were three women and a man moving cautiously toward the street.

I moved right past them, I moved beyond the big delivery van which was not parked properly, and which took up half of the traffic lane. I quickly looked to left, did not see any approaching traffic, and then I looked to the right and saw one stray taxi. So, I quickly jaywalked, hoping that a police officer would not suddenly appear from a manhole.

Then when I was about a block from the store, heavy raindrops began to attack me. I thought about going home, thought about continuing to the store, buying the few items on my shopping list and then, waiting till the rain stopped. I laughed at my good fortune. I was happy to be outside in the rain. I felt like a ten year old. I was ready to run in the rain.

Prayer is often like that. There are times when it is easier to pray, when it is easy to think, reflect, and remember. Prayer can be both soothing and seductive as we allow ourselves to become more vulnerable, to let go of control. I sometimes have to remind myself that prayer is not a monologue. It is a dialogue with God.

My life has always been filled with speculations, rumors, predictions. Like weather reports all that stuff was often wrong but very entertaining for the listeners. Faith protects us, guides us toward goodness, guides us toward the things which we should believe in, guides us toward a deeper more compassionate understanding of humanity.