Hope, Forgiveness honor God: ‘Being Christian . . . has not changed’

Each September arrives with fall to do lists, summer’s lingering list of undone, forgotten, or postponed events. September releases angst in past tense, in present tense, in future tense. This month mumbles “never mind.” Summer newlyweds wait for their photographers to provide proofs and wedding albums. Students wait for instructors to provide course syllabi. Theater subscribers wait for the new season to begin. Strangers talk about autumn trips to London, Rome, Amsterdam. Strangers talk about the beauty of England’s West Country. Strangers talk about alternative evening activities in some cities. Strangers talk of the Catholic Church as the alternative experience. Many things are mentioned in conversations across the world in September. Each passing day becomes shorter and shorter. People go from interview to interview, city to city in search of work. People go from homily to homily in search of hope, in search of God, in search of love. God and Jesus Christ and the Apostle remain staples of Western popular culture, buttressed by Christmas and Easter. The lightness of God remains under attack. Darkness passes into the hearts, minds, and souls of many people creating dark times. This darkness fuels violence, drug addictions, racism, sexism. The light of truth, the light of God remains constant, remains a resource, a guide, a call to return to goodness, holiness, kindness. The light of God intrigues many, encourages many to become believers, encourages others to remain followers.

It was there that I first heard a voice deep inside of me whisper “Find and Share Your Christian Spirit", and naturally I was a little shaken up. Naturally I did nothing until I heard the voice again and again. It was both frightening and exhilarating. I was defiant and lethargic against an immortal chorus, immortal call of hope, call of forgiveness.

I subsequently discovered that this call is not unique to me. Each day all over the world, in every nation in every time zone in many hearts in many different cultures in many different individuals develop a vein of inchoate hope, a desire for goodness, kindness, holiness grows, a prayer for peace and health of all mankind travels through hearts, minds, souls kindling thoughts of universal and unconditional love, kindling thoughts of eternal life, kindling thoughts of salvation. This call maybe be pristine and delicate or heavy-duty rumbling loud. This call is personal, privately territorial speaking to the individual needs first in authentic tones, primal tones. I was reminded of my desire for salvation, my desire for spiritual cleanliness in God’s eyes. Mainstream yet underground my conversion continues each and every day as I learn more and more about God, as I wonder about what more I can do. I have youthful eyes, youthful ears, and a youthful soul as I include service to God more and more in my thoughts and daily activities. There are successful days, and less successful days. Days of hope, days of love follow me, protect me, guide me toward God, guide me toward the footsteps of Jesus Christ.

My journey is not unique; this provides hope as I seek my way toward God. Others have gone before me. Others have sinned. Others have asked for pardon and forgiveness. Asking for pardon and forgiveness from God is not always easy. But it can be done with prayer, reflection.

My rebellion leads me to God, leads me to compassion for my neighbors.

To Think, To See

We each have unique ways of thinking, unique ways of seeing the world. How we interact with each other and with God is personal and unique. What we see, hear, smell, touch is almost as important as how we see it. Life can be beautiful, inspiring prayers and poetry and uplifting lyrics. How we see something and how we relate to it and how we ultimately share it are all equally important. Our entire beings are needed as we listen to God's call, as we answer God's call. As Christians we are part of the Church and part of the world. Each day we are faced with moral and ethical questions. Each day we see and hear things which make us feel uncomfortable. The world needs prayer. The world needs love.

What do you see in this painting? Is there anything familiar? Does this inspire hope? Does it inspire fear? Look closely what do you see? What do you want to see?

Spring Gala

Last night I attended the first annual Spring Gala and Silent Auction at the Dominican House of Study. I went with friends from the Cathedral of Saint Matthew the Apostle. I wore a simple blue blazer and khakis and carried my camera. I imagined eating all types of wonderful foods and drinking gallons of beer and wine. How I wanted to appear rotund and jolly and waiting for Rembrandt to paint my portrait and hang it in the Rijksmuseum Amsterdam! How childish my initial thoughts were.


My journey to the Dominican House of Study began with simple conversation about my life, was briefly punctuated by stories of aggressive driving and speed cameras, and finally ended with a brief discussion about creating a homily with prayer and reflection being important ingredients.


This brief discussion became the leitmotif of the evening. Almost everything was viewed in another way, a different way. Each new person presented the opportunity for prayer. Each new conversation presented the opportunity for silence, for reflection. There was a pleasant musicality to the evening, there was a gentle repetition to the evening. Although each moment was deliciously fugacious, and I was aware that I must not look back with any yearning, I must look forward with hope, look heavenward with mercy.


And familiar faces greeted me and I responded kindly. Forgotten faces greeted me and I responded warmly. Unknown faces greeted me and I responded gently. This was an evening of goodness, holiness, and kindness. After a few minutes more faces were familiar, many connections were dusted off. A few names mischievously remained hidden from my memory.


This was not an evening about remembering names. This was an evening to say thank you, an evening to remember how someone touched your life, an evening of prayers for those present, for those absent, for all those in our hearts and minds.


As I nibbled on this and that my mind kept playing with my delicate, jumbled ideas of Thomism which I knew were somehow connected to St. Thomas Aquinas, a Dominican priest in the Catholic Church.


In search of food and ideas I wandered around the hallways, enjoying turtle soup, bleu cheese, fluffy pastries while wondering how would I describe this evening, wondering how I could help the Dominican House of Studies, how I could encourage others to help.


Our thoughts are often beautiful and energetic impulses splattering on the blank canvas of our minds. Our thoughts are brief flashes of energy. It is this fugacious quality which keeps me human, reminds me to remember to pray for others. Each human being is always in need of prayer, seeing strangers and familiar faces, hearing snippets of conversations, half remembrances, half anecdotes; watching handshakes, hugs, half smiles even in happy faces there is something which quietly asks for prayer. Briefly my mind thinks about praying for someone and just as quickly it is forgotten.


But this Gala reminded me of the need for prayer, the need to move closer to God, the need to show mercy and compassion to everyone that I might encounter. The minutes advanced gently and I realized the real reason why I decided to attend this Gala. I wanted to join in the praying of Compline, The Night Prayer of the Church.


I wanted to hear different voices singing hymns, reciting psalms, praying antiphons in unison. I wanted to see the chapel filled with people, faithful, hopeful, loving, loyal. I wanted to hear myself say and sing the words in the Compline.


While waiting for everyone to enter the chapel, my mind replayed different parts of this day. How wonderful it was to talk about creating a homily, how wonderful it was to wait for Night Prayer to begin. How wonderful it was to have shared this moment, this evening, these prayers!

Laetare Vespers, Cathedral of Saint Matthew the Apostle

Cathedral of Saint Matthew the Apostle Stewardship Sunday 2009

Pugilistic Hope

Young hearts want to believe.

Algebraic symbols are good for certain types of modern discourse, especially for the lower forms of monologues which can be heard in bars, restaurants, parks, grocery stores. It is apparent that many people were never encouraged to stumble into a library, look at books, listen to the music.

Walk down any street and you will hear the adopted jargon of the mass media and see the anxiety which is incessantly encouraged. Distrust rules, reason hides.

Thinking about modern life is easy. Writing about it is challenging yet pleasant.

Different things capture our attention, capture our imagination. We live for sensation and interaction. The sky at twilight is beautiful, words can not adequately describe the calm, the sense of serenity that passes through my mind as my eyes glance upward to the moon surrounded by clouds, slowly disappearing. Words can not express the majesty of the sun, a round orb reclining against a cushion of clouds in a bouquet of muted colors.

Looking at the cityscape as a gentle breeze touches my body, a sense of peace moves through my mind.

In the distance, almost on the horizon, dark smoke rises up, without a zoom camera lens the dark, black smoke appears to rise just in front of the dark green treetops. With a lens, the smoke is further away, actually behind the trees.

One of the best things about the Catholic Church is its pugilistic attitude. The Catholic Church continues to argue for social justice, for fairness, for peace, for life. The Catholic Church never takes a holiday, opens its doors everyday to those in need. The Catholic Church asks us to think before we act. Is that how Jesus would have behaved? Are our lives reflections of Jesus' life? How do we love unconditionally and universally?

The church offers hope and a voice for those unable or afraid to speak.

Young hearts need faith.

Sunlight and Silence

The pale blue sky fades into dark trees on the horizon. I can see the bell towers and steeples of several churches in the city. I can also see the domes of two churches. I can see a man straining to push a cart on the roof of a nearby building. There is a cool breeze. I can feel the warmth of the sunlight on my neck and face.

I can hear multiple sirens, becoming louder, louder, more insistent and then fading away. And then become louder and louder before fading away.

Earlier today, I decided to write about the Catechism of the Catholic Church.

When I opened my eyes this morning, I searched for a topic. I wanted something to anchor my imagination, to direct my mind.

Life has many constants and many variables. In a city constants are automobiles, pedestrians, sidewalks. Variables are sidewalks, pedestrians, and automobiles.

Life provides questions, answers, and mysteries. Every question does not have a solution or an answer.

I find it comforting to see church architecture, the domes, steeples, bell towers are inspiring. They suggest a quest for something beyond a convenient parking space, a freshly laundered silk shirt, or pasteurized orange juice.

I find the Catechism of the Catholic Church comforting. Here is an explanation, a description of my faith. Here is the ultimate companion to the Bible. Here are the Church teachings.

It begins simply.

“The desire for God is written in the human heart, because man is created by God and for God; and God never ceases to draw man to himself.” CCC no. 27

That desire for God has been written and explored for centuries. That desire for God is the reason I am writing and asking questions and reading various books and texts.

God’s call becomes louder, and louder and more insistent and then it fades away. And then it returns louder and louder.

“Let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice” Ps 105:3

And so I am trying to create more time devoted to prayer, more time devoted to silent reflection.

And more time to glance at the horizon, to feel blessed, and to offer thanks to God.

Clouds In The Sky and I Am Learning How to Feel

Looking at the white clouds against the blue sky, hearing the beeping noise of a truck backing up, feeling a warm breeze against my skin I try to concentrate and write about this day.

Recently, I had a brief conversation with a group of friends. I denied the existence of true happiness. I said that in modern America, rabid consumerism has made happiness impossible. I said that materialism creates neither altruism or peace. There is too much anxiety, too much avarice, too much avoidance.

The Church offers an antidote to all of these things if we take the time to examine our consciences and to decide what is really necessary in our lives.

Many luxury items are masquerading as basic necessities. Are cell phones really necessary? Is it necessary to have a pair of alligator shoes? Are designer shirts and jeans really necessary?

I constantly ask myself questions. I sometimes find the answers.

But, I think that I am happiest when I am completely calm, when I am silent, and when I allow myself to thank God for the blessings in my life.

Sitting in the sunlight, occasionally searching the skyline for the Capitol Dome or the Washington Monument in the distance, I realize that consumerism is not the evil enemy; the problem begins with the behaviors which our society freely allows and often encourages.

I wish that consumerism allowed a little room for civility and charity. Our society is in a hurry to deliver the next punch line, to download the next song, to race through yellow lights.

Ed McMahon, Johnny Carson’s sidekick on the Tonight Show died. He was 86. He was an integral part of the show.

Investigators are still trying to determine why a Metro train rear-ended another train on Monday during rush hour. Nine people were killed in the worst commuter rail accident in Washington’s history.

These events remind us of life’s fragility, our own vulnerability. They remind how connected we are to our fellow man. They remind me how much I should close my mouth, stop complaining about little things. They remind me how important it is to follow Jesus’ example and love my neighbor. They remind me that life on earth is short. It is best to spend time in God’s service.

Last night I received a phone call from a friend, who told me that a former coworker was among the dead. My prayers are with the family of Cameron Williams.